So, it’s officially been about 6 weeks from my competition. Annnnd I finally feel like I want to reflect on my experience.
It did not go as I had hoped or planned. That being said, I still did it. Looking back, my posing was not what it should have been, and I know I heard that many times (POSING POSING POSING) but honestly, I now accept that Its more important than anything. I remember standing backstage thinking, I can compete here, my figure is competitive here. I was proud of the package I brought. My glutes, my shoulders, my quads, my waist, I was even proud of my hair and makeup because that’s typically not a strong skill I posses… I was happy. Then I recall being the equivalent to a duck on crutches when I stepped on stage and that was the end of that.
I cried (a lot) that day. It’s just so much devotion, prep, resources, time, energy, money, etc.. for such a long period of time, to walk off stage after pre-judging knowing that you wont be in finals that night. It makes for a bummed out day.
But like I said before, I did it. I still went on stage, regardless of how silly I may have looked during a couple of my transitions in posing, regardless as to whether my legs were shaking faster than a hummingbird’s wings, regardless as to whether I felt like I was going to throw up on the head judges face, regardless as to whether I was sweating so bad my tan started to run (ewww)- I. got. on. stage.
So now, looking back, I’m doing much better at not dwelling on the negative. Not letting myself get frustrated that I feel like I bombed it. I DO know I was capable of better. I DO know that I could do it again and build on with what I’ve learned (not sure if I will, but I have confidence that I can).
So basically, I’m to a point where looking back seems silly. Chin up, look ahead and move on to the next thing/goal/journey/challenge.
The only time you should be looking back is to see how far you’ve come… And to check out your booty.